Absolutely Zoe

Creating silly things to make myself (and sometimes other people) laugh.
When I am genuinely sick and need a day off and my boss says to take it as holiday.

When I am genuinely sick and need a day off and my boss says to take it as holiday.

When I’m eating a burger and my phone buzzes in my pocket. I put my burger down, wipe my hands, take out my phone, and it’s a message from Domino’s.

When I’m eating a burger and my phone buzzes in my pocket. I put my burger down, wipe my hands, take out my phone, and it’s a message from Domino’s.

When a greasy 50-year-old man with a leer messages me on Ok Cupid.

When a greasy 50-year-old man with a leer messages me on Ok Cupid.

When you choose to stand on one end of the tube carriage and three seats on the other end become available and it’s too crowded to get there before anyone else.

When you choose to stand on one end of the tube carriage and three seats on the other end become available and it’s too crowded to get there before anyone else.

When the tube driver makes an announcement and he has a South African accent.

When the tube driver makes an announcement and he has a South African accent.

When my boss asks my opinion in the Monday morning meeting.

When my boss asks my opinion in the Monday morning meeting.

Being on the Northern line during the tube strikes.

Being on the Northern line during the tube strikes.

Preparing your friend to go speed dating.

Preparing your friend to go speed dating.

When a woman sitting on the tube puts away her newspaper when approaching the station, then doesn’t get off.

When a woman sitting on the tube puts away her newspaper when approaching the station, then doesn’t get off.

When my Ben & Jerry’s Karamel Sutra Core isn’t perfectly centred.

When my Ben & Jerry’s Karamel Sutra Core isn’t perfectly centred.